Moving forward.

My kids complain about writing 5 paragraph essays. 300 words essays. 10 minute extended bellwork. 5 minute regular bellwork.

I just finished writing an embarrassingly long sub letter. It's embarrassing. Really. 1423 words.

Now to be fair, I've always been a bit verbose. I've been trying to cut back on that in class, but it just happens a lot. I like words. And I like saying words.

But I also feel like it's somewhat justified. There are so many little things that I don't want to leave out, little hints that should hopefully help, important procedures, the way I do things. It's my class and they're my babies, and I don't want to leave anything out. I'm going to be gone. The least I can do is leave overbearing instructions!

I remember writing classroom procedures at the beginning of the year. It took forever, mostly because I had no idea what I was doing. Writing education papers about management and crap took forever. Now, not so bad. A little bit fun, minus that part where I don't get to be there.

And I'm struck by how blessed I am to love what I do.

More blessings of the week that are directly related to said sub letter....

1) I have a sub! She is a missionary here from the States and has children at my school. I'm so thankful to officially have someone, and the fact that she is a native English Speaker and invested in the school/not going to leave after a week is such an answer to prayer. I'm hoping to meet with her and talk with her tomorrow and she might even be able to come and observe a class.

2) I have a surgery date. Next week Thursday. I can't quite process that one week from this moment I will be sleeping in a hospital bed with a tube coming out of my nose. Or that my parents will be here. Or, to be honest, that I have cancer and this is happening. But at least there's a date to start moving me toward that reality.

3) I am done with 2nd quarter. All my grades are turned in, I'm not accepting any more work, and we're ready to look forward.


This means that I'm also halfway done with my first year of teaching. That's another thing that's nearly impossible to wrap my mind around.

I can't say that it's the year I expected it to be. In a lot of ways, it's been an easier transition than I thought it would be. After all, first year teachers are supposed to hate their lives always. In other ways, it's been a lot harder and just DIFFERENT than I expected it to be. So many surprises.

Looking back on the first half, I see so much evidence that God is indeed good. Here are just a couple of the millions of examples... and those are just the ones I see.

- My worst class period became my best period
- Way less students failed this quarter than last
- Even though my students are "big" and "cool," I still get hugs and waves and hear my name said in hallways about a billion times a day
-I really enjoy the company of all of my students
- I have a great support system in this country. My friends and co-workers are beyond what I ever could have asked for
- My friends and family back home are always gracious when it takes me way too long to get back to them, and they love me through EVERYTHING
- There has been SO MUCH support throughout my surprise surgery and cancer - spiritually, emotionally, financially, everything
- I almost have enough money to pay for both of my surgeries, and I didn't even ask anyone about it
- I have grown in my faith
- I had emergency surgery, healed well, and they were able to diagnose a hard to diagnose cancer that will now be dealt with one surgery
- I don't need radiation or chemo
- The sun shines almost every day
- I'm halfway through and I still love my job.

Tomorrow is my last day for a while, and I'm bummed. I'd prefer to be there. But as I look forward through the perspective of the last 5 months (and 23 years),  there is so much proof that God is good, all the time and that all the time, God is good. When I'm bummed, when I'm angry, when I'm sad, when I'm happy... no matter my mood or awareness... God is good.